I simply have to ask: are you actually claiming that my son, who is in the IDF, is not protecting Am Yisrael? That my son, who is giving up two years of his life because he feels a responsibility to his people and country, is not doing anything productive? Maybe I misunderstood you; but if I did not, I am genuinely shocked at the callousness and cruelty implicit in what you're saying. Even if you believe it, saying it to parents of soldiers is horrible.
I’m not questioning your son’s sincerity, bravery, or good intentions. I’m questioning the **system** that demands his sacrifice without honest public accountability or strategic clarity.
I am deeply aware that your son feels a sense of duty — and I respect that. But the fact that he is willing to give of himself doesn’t automatically make every mission just, every order wise, or every objective necessary. That’s not a criticism of him — it’s a criticism of a system that too often operates without questioning itself.
You’ve said several times that it’s “horrible” to say these things to the parent of a soldier. I ask in return: *when* are we allowed to say them? Must we wait until the parents are in mourning? Until more lives are wasted on missions no one can explain?
We should be having these conversations *exactly because* we care about the lives of our soldiers — not because we don’t.
This is not about your son. This is about a culture that too often confuses loyalty with silence, and sacrifice with holiness. I want your son — and everyone’s son — to come home alive. That’s why I ask hard questions. Not to offend — but to protect.
If that’s uncomfortable, it only proves how necessary the conversation really is.
Look at the facts on the ground since Trump became president The mission is to win the war and prevent Iran from spreading Islamic terrorism and become g a nuclear power
The rules of engagement have changed substantially and radically since Trump was inaugurated The mission is to win the war not to sorry about the day after
"Last Friday morning I was doing errands to prepare for Shabbat. Out of curiosity, I peeked into a local synagogue - a “shteiblach” - that has minyanim all morning."
As a Yiddishist, I must protest. "Shteiblach" is plural, the singular form is "Shtibel". Zol der Aibishter halten zeyn rekhter hant oyf deyn zun und alle Chayalei Tzahal aky"r.
I don’t speak Yiddish; however, the term “shtieblach ” here refers to a single shul with multiple rooms in use as separate minyanim. In fact, the word “shtieblach” appears over the door of the shul I referenced, and is a common term in Israel for a shul that has minyanim taking place in several rooms throughout the day.
They threaten, if drafted, to emigrate. What land do they imagine will accept a population that (1) doesn’t work, (2) doesn’t serve, and (3) consists of Jews?
I believe your son is a hero and a tzaddik. I wish him well on his mission and I hope he's fully successful.
I've said it once and I'll say it again: writing like this post does not help. It further inflames. It does not convince anyone. And it reeks of envy of "those people" who have it easier.
This post is quite important because it shows the thinly disguised contempt not just for the war effort but also for normative Halacha No self respecting Ben Torah or Avrech should be davening Shacharis at 11:05 AM
Can someone who believes everyone is obligated to "serve" in the IDF because they are supposedly fighting a "milchemes mitzva" please explain the following:
1. How is it a milchemes mitzva when there is no intention to defeat the enemy, and there never was?
2. How is it a milchemes mitzva when there is no intention to conquer land, let alone increase settlement in Eretz Yisrael?
You know full well that both of these points are true, and you complain about it all the time. So how is it still a milchemes mitzva? These two questions must be fully addressed before you can even begin to play the milchemes mitzva card.
You cannot just wave these questions away with claims that "the IDF is keeping us safe", and "it would be even worse otherwise". First of all, you have no way to prove that, and no one is obligated to accept such an argument to join an army and endanger themselves physically and spiritually under these conditions.
Second of all, that's the "pikuach nefesh" card, which is different than the "milechemes mitzva" card. So if you're immediately falling back on that, you are acknowledging that this is NOT a milchemes mitzva, and can no longer play that card.
The following are supplemental questions.
3. How is it a milchemes mitzva when the army you are part of is arming and supplying your enemies?
4. How is it a milchemes mitzva when you are led into battle by kofrim and corrupt leaders who routinely get Jews maimed and killed for political considerations, diplomatic considerations, PR considerations, and other ulterior motives (even if you don't believe such motives are sinister)?
These are serious questions. If you are going to use halachic terms like "milchemes mitzva" you must seriously address these issues. Otherwise you have no right to make demands of Torah-true Jews, expect them to take you seriously, or even argue from the standpoint that you are a Torah-true Jew yourself.
Defending conscription into an army that has no intention of winning is the highest form of Stockholm syndrome. You send your kids on suicide missions and demand we send ours to make it fair. The state is a cult and you're all chumps.
Not true. I see the jobniks in the kirya, they aren’t doing guard duty and they aren’t working long hours. Yes some are people with low profiles but others are people who don’t want combat duty.
I suggest that you go today during bein hazmanim to one of the many batei Medrash at 11:05 and see how many boys are sitting and learning very seriously doing Bein hazmanim. Then come to Tel Aviv the next day at 11:05 near the kirya and see how many soldiers in uniform are lounging around in the coffe shops enjoying themselves.
I am genuinely puzzled as to what you are trying to argue. I never said that all Chareidim or Chassidim daven at 11:05 AM; my exact quote was, "There are some individuals in the Chareidi and Chassidic worlds who act in an exemplary manner. There are others who are an absolute disgrace. A disgrace to Torah Judaism." Are you trying to say that because some or even many Chareidim learn during bein hazmanim that we should excuse those who don't rather than sending them draft notices?
And I'm equally puzzled regarding your point about soldiers in coffee shops. There is a very big difference between a soldier getting coffee at 11:05 and starting your day at 11:05. (And if you believe that those guys in the shtiebel were up learning since 7, then say that and see if it's true - otherwise you're comparing someone taking a break at 11 am to someone who at 11 am has not yet started doing then thing that ostensibly is the source of their draft deferment.)
And I will add that I take personally your implication that soldiers are just hanging out and therefore are comparable to guys who get deferments and then wake up whenever they want to do whatever they want. Even if you were right (which I reject): soldiers are literally putting their lives on the line and any comparison is offensive.
Then what's your point? Seriously, I have no idea what you're arguing. Should ostensible yeshiva students who get up whenever they want not be drafted? If they should, then we agree and jobniks in the army taking a coffee break (not waking up late btw) are irrelevant to both of us. And if they should not, how does jobniks in the kirya prove that point? Do you think that a jobnik taking a break somehow means that a chasidish 20-year-old who doesn't take yeshiva seriously somehow should be exempt altogether?
Thank you for writing and publishing this. And thank you very much to your son for what he is doing for Am Yisrael.
bigtzaddik69 says:
March 25, 2025 8:48 pm at 8:48 pm
Good to see they’re on top of the important nitpicking, instead of paying attention to major issues like abuse and agunos. Tuition.
Instead, let’s nitpick the difference between our beige version of frumness and their taupe version of frumness. They’re so very different.
I put my trust in the gedolim. They have our best interests at heart.
My favorite comment of many dismissive comments
That's bizarre.
How is following suicidal orders protecting am yisrael exactly?
I simply have to ask: are you actually claiming that my son, who is in the IDF, is not protecting Am Yisrael? That my son, who is giving up two years of his life because he feels a responsibility to his people and country, is not doing anything productive? Maybe I misunderstood you; but if I did not, I am genuinely shocked at the callousness and cruelty implicit in what you're saying. Even if you believe it, saying it to parents of soldiers is horrible.
I’m not questioning your son’s sincerity, bravery, or good intentions. I’m questioning the **system** that demands his sacrifice without honest public accountability or strategic clarity.
I am deeply aware that your son feels a sense of duty — and I respect that. But the fact that he is willing to give of himself doesn’t automatically make every mission just, every order wise, or every objective necessary. That’s not a criticism of him — it’s a criticism of a system that too often operates without questioning itself.
You’ve said several times that it’s “horrible” to say these things to the parent of a soldier. I ask in return: *when* are we allowed to say them? Must we wait until the parents are in mourning? Until more lives are wasted on missions no one can explain?
We should be having these conversations *exactly because* we care about the lives of our soldiers — not because we don’t.
This is not about your son. This is about a culture that too often confuses loyalty with silence, and sacrifice with holiness. I want your son — and everyone’s son — to come home alive. That’s why I ask hard questions. Not to offend — but to protect.
If that’s uncomfortable, it only proves how necessary the conversation really is.
Let me know when the IDF decides to fight a war to actually win, then I will gladly join.
Not sure what you mean, but people who are drafted don't get that choice. And no one should or chaos would ensue.
Sucks to be drafted, but sucks even worse to die. I know lots of people in Israel who get paturs.
They will be there sooner than you think
That's...not the way countries *work*.
Look at the facts on the ground since Trump became president The mission is to win the war and prevent Iran from spreading Islamic terrorism and become g a nuclear power
I'll believe it when the Jews move into Gaza
The rules of engagement have changed substantially and radically since Trump was inaugurated The mission is to win the war not to sorry about the day after
This is truly important for all to be aware of and take to heart. It makes the news out of Moetzes Gedolei HaTorah hurt that much more.
https://www.theyeshivaworld.com/news/general/2381901/kol-koreh-moetzes-gedolei-hatorah-of-america-it-is-assur-to-vote-in-wzo-election.html
"Last Friday morning I was doing errands to prepare for Shabbat. Out of curiosity, I peeked into a local synagogue - a “shteiblach” - that has minyanim all morning."
As a Yiddishist, I must protest. "Shteiblach" is plural, the singular form is "Shtibel". Zol der Aibishter halten zeyn rekhter hant oyf deyn zun und alle Chayalei Tzahal aky"r.
I don’t speak Yiddish; however, the term “shtieblach ” here refers to a single shul with multiple rooms in use as separate minyanim. In fact, the word “shtieblach” appears over the door of the shul I referenced, and is a common term in Israel for a shul that has minyanim taking place in several rooms throughout the day.
You would still say the shteiblach. It's a plural noun like media.
It's a generic word for other places as well.
Indeed, it's a diminutive of 'shtub' (house/home).
They threaten, if drafted, to emigrate. What land do they imagine will accept a population that (1) doesn’t work, (2) doesn’t serve, and (3) consists of Jews?
As an orthodox person I must agree with much of what you say.
I would add that the sanctimonious attitude can be found among all sections of Israel society secular traditional dati charedi etc etc.
National soul searching is necessary.
OK, but what about *this* situation?
I believe your son is a hero and a tzaddik. I wish him well on his mission and I hope he's fully successful.
I've said it once and I'll say it again: writing like this post does not help. It further inflames. It does not convince anyone. And it reeks of envy of "those people" who have it easier.
Is there something wrong with envy in this situation?
Generally a good idea to focus on one’s own life and what the right choice is for onseself. Being other-focused is usually a bad idea.
So what do you suggest we do about it?
Only a sense of moral narcissism can explain a minyan davening Shachris at 11:00 while their brothers are exposed to sub human animals in Gaza
This post is quite important because it shows the thinly disguised contempt not just for the war effort but also for normative Halacha No self respecting Ben Torah or Avrech should be davening Shacharis at 11:05 AM
Can someone who believes everyone is obligated to "serve" in the IDF because they are supposedly fighting a "milchemes mitzva" please explain the following:
1. How is it a milchemes mitzva when there is no intention to defeat the enemy, and there never was?
2. How is it a milchemes mitzva when there is no intention to conquer land, let alone increase settlement in Eretz Yisrael?
You know full well that both of these points are true, and you complain about it all the time. So how is it still a milchemes mitzva? These two questions must be fully addressed before you can even begin to play the milchemes mitzva card.
You cannot just wave these questions away with claims that "the IDF is keeping us safe", and "it would be even worse otherwise". First of all, you have no way to prove that, and no one is obligated to accept such an argument to join an army and endanger themselves physically and spiritually under these conditions.
Second of all, that's the "pikuach nefesh" card, which is different than the "milechemes mitzva" card. So if you're immediately falling back on that, you are acknowledging that this is NOT a milchemes mitzva, and can no longer play that card.
The following are supplemental questions.
3. How is it a milchemes mitzva when the army you are part of is arming and supplying your enemies?
4. How is it a milchemes mitzva when you are led into battle by kofrim and corrupt leaders who routinely get Jews maimed and killed for political considerations, diplomatic considerations, PR considerations, and other ulterior motives (even if you don't believe such motives are sinister)?
These are serious questions. If you are going to use halachic terms like "milchemes mitzva" you must seriously address these issues. Otherwise you have no right to make demands of Torah-true Jews, expect them to take you seriously, or even argue from the standpoint that you are a Torah-true Jew yourself.
Defending conscription into an army that has no intention of winning is the highest form of Stockholm syndrome. You send your kids on suicide missions and demand we send ours to make it fair. The state is a cult and you're all chumps.
Not true. I see the jobniks in the kirya, they aren’t doing guard duty and they aren’t working long hours. Yes some are people with low profiles but others are people who don’t want combat duty.
I suggest that you go today during bein hazmanim to one of the many batei Medrash at 11:05 and see how many boys are sitting and learning very seriously doing Bein hazmanim. Then come to Tel Aviv the next day at 11:05 near the kirya and see how many soldiers in uniform are lounging around in the coffe shops enjoying themselves.
I am genuinely puzzled as to what you are trying to argue. I never said that all Chareidim or Chassidim daven at 11:05 AM; my exact quote was, "There are some individuals in the Chareidi and Chassidic worlds who act in an exemplary manner. There are others who are an absolute disgrace. A disgrace to Torah Judaism." Are you trying to say that because some or even many Chareidim learn during bein hazmanim that we should excuse those who don't rather than sending them draft notices?
And I'm equally puzzled regarding your point about soldiers in coffee shops. There is a very big difference between a soldier getting coffee at 11:05 and starting your day at 11:05. (And if you believe that those guys in the shtiebel were up learning since 7, then say that and see if it's true - otherwise you're comparing someone taking a break at 11 am to someone who at 11 am has not yet started doing then thing that ostensibly is the source of their draft deferment.)
You devoted a whole post to them. I just wanted to point out that there are a lot who are sitting and learning during bein hazmanim.
Wonderful. Kol hakavod. And it has nothing to do with what I wrote.
And I will add that I take personally your implication that soldiers are just hanging out and therefore are comparable to guys who get deferments and then wake up whenever they want to do whatever they want. Even if you were right (which I reject): soldiers are literally putting their lives on the line and any comparison is offensive.
Sorry no. Jobniks who work in the kirya aren’t putting their lives on the line.
Then what's your point? Seriously, I have no idea what you're arguing. Should ostensible yeshiva students who get up whenever they want not be drafted? If they should, then we agree and jobniks in the army taking a coffee break (not waking up late btw) are irrelevant to both of us. And if they should not, how does jobniks in the kirya prove that point? Do you think that a jobnik taking a break somehow means that a chasidish 20-year-old who doesn't take yeshiva seriously somehow should be exempt altogether?
Most jobniks are so designated because they had a lower health profile, not because they are shirking.
There is a huge and obvious difference between learning in an intensive Seder at 11:00 and davening Shacharis at 11:00